Life Reality Check

What is Life? Life for some people is not what they wish it is now. So much is taken for granted as a young person.

Life happens so fast that we don’t know It’s almost over. Suddenly we are left with the reality that we get what we put into it.

Life has its own realities and they are absolutes. It is these absolutes people wish they knew earlier before life started taking its toll.

You may call it your ‘Blind spot’ or your ‘ignorance zone’. I call it Life reality check.

So always you may need to fact-check yourself even if you don’t believe the scriptures. There is a spirit in every man that bears witness.

Reality is ‘a constant’ while situations and circumstances of life change. The former is conservative and the latter reactionary.

It is important we know this. So we can have the right attitude to situations and circumstances we face in this world.

There are always fundamentals to live by, we all often experience adverse situations and circumstances in life. Such conditions should bring us closer to our nature and cause us to probe our five levels of relationships.

It is important because I have personally experienced the benefit of it. When I lost my business, my home and almost my marriage and life. There are fundamental principles and tools to achieve greatness and relevance in life.


In managing our lives effectively, the key is to know our WHY, WHAT and HOW.

It is something you must desire to know and must not be ignorant of as a grown adult.

I have seen many people at their death beds regret not working on their relationships. Especially with their Creator because they never gave good thought to it or looked inward enough into their souls.

When I was a kid just like any other kid, we all had expectation for love, security and becoming great whatever that meant to us; and depending on where we lived and were growing up.

But as we related with the world, the people and the environment, we began to form our own opinions about relationships, about ourselves, about people, the society in general, about God and the Evil in the world.

In our minds there is a real world with real people with real problems. And as we grow, conflicts begin to build in the mind, which happens mostly with young people and they become easily conflicted.

This is the challenge when we don’t get the right teacher or mentor to instruct us on the basic principles of life and living in the world. Refer to my earlier post on “The Extinction of Fathers”.

Everything in life, works by a set of principles. Our application of these principles at the right time brings to us the success we need and prevents the frustrations and regrets most people experience in life.

So, knowing the WHY of your life is critical for success in life and knowing the WHAT and HOW brings the wealth and peace you need to enjoy your life.

Five things you should know early to win in Life

  1. Recognize your role and the five levels of relationships you have as a Person. These are your relationship with yourself, your Source, the world, with other people and the evil in the world. Recognizing and managing these relationships according to pattern, principles and means acceptable to whom all humans are accountable will put you in good stead always for a balanced life.
  2. Learn basic things about the way the world works, learn about people, value of time, yourself, the origin of man, the cause and effect of evil in the world, so you can properly define things for yourself early: and the various perspectives that exist. Learning includes how to fight and when to fight. In the race of life, note there is fighting to be done. Nothing just happens to us. We make things happen. As seen in Psalm 90:12 and in 1 Timothy 6:12 respectively, So teach us to number our days that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom” and “Fight the good fight of faith…” so, you see, this fighting is totally different from getting into a brawl or physical contention with people. It is being strong willed, emotionally strong and outwardly courageous to maintain your stand. Always it is our expression of our faith, hope and love so we can confront every challenge on our path of progress and success in life.
  3. Think in terms of giving and not taking, this is important for everyone in the world. We were all created for a definite purpose which is to give something in exchange for what we want to have in the world. This is what gives birth to enterprise, creativity, invention, work, value, wealth and the currencies and assets we own and enjoy. The mistake people often make is to have a “taking mentality”. Most people think of acquisition without defining the purpose for it. The consequences are usually the abuse of power and the destruction it has brought to many people.
  4. Look for a father figure who can guide you in the truth. I have my father and mentor- Chris Oyakhilome who has taught me almost everything I do today. You can have many teachers but have just one father. A father is not necessarily a biological parent. But one who has experience and results in life. Someone who can hold you by the hand and teach the discipline you need to win in life. Always there is a good and the right way and everyone needs guidance. The good way is a peaceful choice over the shrewd and selfish lifestyle.
  5. Start early to write your own story, this is what entrepreneurship is and what brand managers say is the secret of successful personal brands. I made up my mind to write my story at a much later date in my life. This is because I didn’t know most of the things I am sharing today. One of the most important five levels of relationships I needed to know and be grounded in, was my personal relationship with my Source through the grace extended to me in Christ Jesus. This discovery made my own story easier to tell. It made my fights easier to do. Since the discovery, I have been fighting from a place of rest. So, learning to tell your story, is about how you overcame adversity, poverty and evil in the world to the place of good success that you enjoy today. Remember the foundation is knowing the different levels of relationships we have and managing them by the Book and the Spirit. Your story and my story of where we were and where we are today should be about being able to put the dots together about our life and journey so far.

My Advice

Dream Success! Think Success within the compass of Purpose. It shouldn’t be a standalone thing. Think of who gives Purpose. Honor and Riches. Cultivate a relationship with Him and He will constantly clarify the bumps and hazards you and I meet in our journey in life. Cheers.


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About Tim Onebamoi

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